Parenting Information

Featured Article on Parenting: The Power of Belonging


Search for Assurance: The Power of Belonging

The job hunt is on, as is the quest to find another great preschool and neighborhood to be part of. After feeling out of place, hearing over and over that an item I'm searching for is not available, or a pretty basic procedure I thought I had a grasp of is "done differently here. You must be from overseas," I'm really glad to be back.

It's as I suspected-we each have a checklist of things we rely on to assure us that all is okay. For my elderly aunt, reciting the family tree mentally anchors her in the family, and strengthens her sense of belonging to it. I never understood before, but she has actually memorized the biographical details of most of the family members. She orients herself by acknowledging aloud who's married to whom, who's building, and how many children they have, where they graduated from, and the names of all of the grandchildren. I used to search for mention of myself in this Roll Call of Impressive Achievers. This year, I decided that establishing my own checklist of anchoring events was more important to me than being named on someone else's. I started by writing and compiling a book with my daughter.

Another important step in my ongoing orientation was hearing the words "Welcome Home" when we cleared customs on our way back to Massachusetts. It was hearing the airline pilot comment on seeing my Red Sox cap the night we flew in: "They won the World Series, you know." I don't follow baseball, football or any team sport for that matter, but at the moment I cherished the sense of belonging conferred by my symbolically significant headgear.

That sense of belonging is especially important during childhood. It meant the world when my friends and I were choosing teams. I always dreaded being the last one picked, because it made me feel like I had no enviable skill in throwing, catching or running, and therefore nothing that either team really coveted to ensure its victory. Truth is, I didn't have any such skill, but that didn't curb my wanting to be a part of things. Everyone likes to belong, whether it be as part of a family, part of a culture, or as everyone in Boston can tell you, part of a winning team.

But back to the search, the beauty of it is simply having something to choose from. Not lots of products and services, but endless variations on each, and always an emphasis on the consumer's convenience. I've been to the mall three times, and always leave in a state of amazement. Part of that is mall-induced exhaustion, but it also comes from feeling overwhelmed by the sheer scale of the structure.

For the first time in months, I am not apologetic about being a foreigner, nor am I fearful of ridicule for being an American. It's good to be home, and back to a search mode I can look forward to.

Tricia Wellington is the mother of one toddler.

copyright little-turnips.com 2003-2005. All rights reserved.

Tricia Wellington is the mother of one toddler.

  


MORE RESOURCES:

Belfast Telegraph

Charlize Theron on parenting son Jackson (minus her potty mouth)
Los Angeles Times (blog)
We've always loved Charlize Theron for her sleek blond beauty. And the way she talks like a sailor. Think of her beautifully executed turn as Mavis Gary, the foul-mouthed lead of last year's "Young Adult." While Charlize isn't actually evil, ...
Charlize Theron Not Too Hard On Herself As A New MomMTV.com

all 13 news articles »


'Facebook parenting' is destroying our children's privacy
CNN
Editor's note: Aisha Sultan is a parenting columnist at the St. Louis Post-Dispatch and recent Knight Wallace Fellow at the University of Michigan. Follow her on Twitter: @AishaS. Jon Miller is director of the Longitudinal Study of American Youth in ...

and more »


The parallel universe of parenting
Fremont Tribune
One, is that parenting baby ducks is a difficult task. And two, some parents are better (or luckier) than others. Case in point is the current crop of ducklings that call this small, old sandpit home. The first batch that we noticed was a darker, ...



PsychCentral.com

Parenting Tips: Yelling vs. Choices
Eastern Arizona Courier
If you yell on occasion, you won't damage your kids, but still, it is not a good parenting strategy for creating good behavior. A screaming adult can activate a child's fight-or-flight response, which in turn shuts down his ability to think something ...
Respectful Child Discipline Starts with the ParentPsychCentral.com (blog)

all 2 news articles »


National Post

Apodaca: Don't listen to parenting naysayers
Daily Pilot
The photo was a provocative lead-in for an article on the latest controversy over the issue of child rearing, the practice of what's called attachment parenting. Now the subject is all over the news, providing fodder for talk shows, ...
Crying over (breast)milk: Muddling through in spite of the mothering absolutistsNational Post
Attached at the NipPatch.com

all 3 news articles »


Positive parenting – raising children into successful adults
DI-VE
by di-ve.com - editorial@di-ve.com Parenting techniques based on love, encouragement and discipline are more likely to encourage children grow up secure, disciplined, well-behaved and with high self-esteem than criticising them and using incorrect ...

and more »


Parenting group bans unvaccinated adults
msnbc.com (blog)
By Diane Mapes The recent whooping cough (pertussis) epidemic in Washington state has prompted the parent support group PEPS to issue a new policy regarding participation in their groups. "Because of the pertussis epidemic in Washington, ...

and more »


TabTimes

This week in tablets: For devices, publishing and even parenting, simplicity ...
TabTimes
by George Jones May 26 2012, 1:10 am Comment Also inside: Cisco bids sayonara to the Cius, and Yahoo does the same with LiveStand. Validation for tablet devices, users, and developers came this week across multiple categories, industries and lifestyles ...

and more »


Quigg: Much of parenting is reactive
Herald & Review
Some of parenting is proactive: planning ahead, laying out positive expectations and being ready with knowledge and resources. But much of parenting is reactive: helping our children learn to deal successfully with whatever comes their way.



Judges rarely meet young in parenting disputes, says study
Katherine Times
In New Zealand, 65 per cent of Family Court judges said they often, very often or always met a child who was the subject of a parenting dispute. Dr Fernando said Australia was lagging behind other countries in attitudes to children meeting with judges.

and more »

Google News

Article List | Index | Site Map
All logos, trademarks and articles on this site are property and copyright of their respective owner(s).
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest is Copyright © 2006 CanadaSEEK.com - All Rights Reserved.