6 Signs You're A High Maintenance Parent
The children of Baby Boomers, the Echo Generation, are entering college in increasing numbers. Getting into the best schools is increasingly competitive. Having good grades, a great SAT score and participating in extracurricular activities is no assurance that your student will get into the school of their choice.
Because of that phenomenon, parents are taking a much more active role in their children's college admission process. But for some parents, participation in their child's college search has led to a troubling development that college admissions officers are seeing more frequently.
It is the High Maintenance Parent (HMP). And college admissions officers are reporting it more and more. If you answer yes to any of these six questions, you may be a High Maintenance Parent.
1. Does your child barely know what's on their college application but you can quote every word in their personal essay (because you wrote it)?
Students who don't take an active role in their college planning and admission process tend not to be successful in college. Students need to take ownership of the process because it's their future on the line. It's time to cut the umbilical cord and let little Johnny fail or succeed. In the end it's a disservice to your child if you do the work for him.
2. Is the admissions officer at the school of your choice on your speed dial and recognizes your voice or phone number when you call?
You want your child to be memorable, not you. Don't be a pest. It can count against your child.
3. Are you asking (or telling) your child to apply to schools that they are not interested in just so YOU can brag that they got into Harvard, Stanford, etc?
It's hard enough for your child to do everything necessary to apply to college without the added stress of completing applications for schools they don't want to go to. This is not the time to relive your past or try to out-Jones the Joneses'.
4. Is your "back-up" strategy for financial aid to tell the financial aid officer that your child is so smart, talented, etc that they should pay you to LET your child attend XYZ University?
By knowing your expected family contribution before applying, you save yourself from the potential surprise of getting an award letter with less aid then you were expecting. And make sure you research the college's financial aid policy to know if you have a circumstance that would cause the school to revisit your award letter.
5. Have you talked to your attorney about suing your child's high school because she did not get the special attention she needed in high school, and thus, will not be able to attend the university of her choice?
Be an active parent throughout your child's education, don't start in her senior year as she applies to colleges. The reality is, at that point it's too late. If she needs special attention in high school make sure she gets it.
6. Have you asked the guidance counselor at the high school to purge evidence of cheating, truancy or other discipline problems from your child's record in order to increase their chance of getting into the college of their choice? If so, you are DEFINITELY a High Maintenance Parent!
You put your child and all other students applying from that high school at risk by asking guidance counselors to lie by omission. If admissions personnel find that student records are being sanitized, they can refuse to admit anyone from a particular high school.
College admissions is a competitive process with each party looking to get the best result. Admissions officers are responsible for admitting a diverse student body. They want students that will reflect the values of the institution and who will be a positive contribution to the student body. Now, while they are still in your house, is the time to impart those values and position your child to be an asset to the student body.
Balanced against the school's needs is the student's desire to be admitted. The best way for you to help your child is by being an advocate and mentor, but realize, ultimately the decision and experience of college will be up to your child.
Copyright © 2004. All Rights Reserved.
Felicia Caldwell Gopaul, CFP, CCPS specializes in late-stage college funding planning utilizing unique tax, financial and academic strategies that can dramatically lower college costs and still enable parents to save for retirement and other financial priorities.
If you are confused or overwhelmed by the college planning process and want more information on how to get started, call (201) 453-9875 or visit www.CollegeFundingResource.com
Ben Franklin and Thomas Jefferson Never Went To Public School
Most of our Founding Fathers, including Ben Franklin, Sam Adams, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and James Madison, like most average colonial Americans, spent few years, if any, in formal grammar schools of the day, yet they knew how to read and write well.Most voluntary local grammar schools expected parents to teach their children to read and write before they started school.
There are moments in a parent's or grandparent's life, when they receive validation for the way they are living, or, have lived, that life. These moments are usually quiet ones, with no fanfare celebrating the occasion.
Top Seven Tips for Back-to-School Success
Parents play a critical role in their child's success. These seven tips from http://www.
Childhood Obesity & Parents Healthy Food Confusion
Many parents struggle to know which foods are healthy for their children. When they are able to opt for healthy choices, about two-thirds struggle to get their children to eat healthily, a poll of nearly 800 parents found.
Managing Your Stepfamily
If you are a member of a stepfamily, you know how difficult it can be to integrate all of the new members and adjust to the new boundaries and rules. The following ideas may help you make a successful transition during this challenging process.
Helpful Tips for the Adoptive Grandparent
Few things are more completely enjoyable than becoming a grandparent. Grandchildren are one of life's joys, whether they come by birth or via adoption.
Handling Failure -- Teaching Kids How to Profit From It
There is nothing pleasant about failure, at least not at the time that it happens! Failure embarrasses us, feels bad, and often costs us money. Little wonder that people avoid failure like the plague.
Home For The Holidays: Ask Yourself Some Questions
Annie easily slipped into becoming the sole caregiver of her parents. What started out as monthly grocery shopping for them, over the course of 2 years became a full time duty, an overwhelming burden and just about broke her emotionally and financially.
Hearing Our Seriously Distressed Children
How do we deal with our seriously distressed children and adolescents?Adolescents are in a period of seeking autonomy and self-determination. These qualities can aid them in becoming agents of active transformation in their own lives.
Maximizing Your ADHD Childs Performance in School.
As a parent there are lots of things that you can do to help your child with ADHD succeed in school, with friends, and in life. Here are some tips for you that just may help you in your ongoing efforts to help your child.
The Most Innovative New Approach for ADHD, a Natural Remedy
What's new and effective in the treatment of Attention problems? A powerful intervention that is clinically tested with computerized testing, not merely parent reports, has been available to the public since 1997, but is little known. It is an over the counter product that contains specific Amino Acid combinations, Essential Fatty Acids, Phospholipid complexes, and Homeopathic Medicines.
Adderall and Its Side-Effects
Adderall is a stimulant medication used in the treatment of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder in both children and adults. It is made from a combination of four amphetamine compounds.
The Scientific Breakthrough That Allows Every Couple To Choose The Gender Of Their Baby
The advances in science over the past century have been breath-taking. We've seen man stroll casually on the moon, watched in awe as scientists cloned and brought a sheep to life using nothing more than a few strands of microscopic DNA and we witnessed some stunning improvements in the fields of medicine and care - for example, Viagra to some has been the discovery of a lifetime.
Intermission: Wood Chips
I wanted to share with you one of the most valuable lessons my daughter taught me when she was sixteen-months-old. I call this essay, "Cherish Your Wood Chips.
7 Easy Ideas for Organizing Kids Artwork
In school, kids are encouraged to create, draw, color, paint and build. These activities can certainly stimulate children, and help them grow.
Potty Training Caveats- Dont Start Too Soon
The First Reason: For one thing, child development experts are concerned that previous generations of parents were putting too much pressure on their children to potty train early. Children were often being punished for not learning to use the toilet.
How Do I Get My Child to Read?
Well first off, please to don't institute the ˝ hour of mandatory reading that so many schools and parents are so keen on these days. You want to encourage a life-long love of reading and frankly you would be much more likely to succeed by banning reading in your house then by turning reading into yet another chore that needs to be done.
Theres Never a Bad Time To Start Helping To Spread The Word of God
Q. What's the right age to start giving a Bible quiz to my child?A.
Play the Ball, Not the Man!
As parents and teachers, sometimes we want to praise, at other times we need to rebuke. Either way, how do we put our point across with maximum effectiveness? Adults entrusted with the character training of children have few weapons in their armory as powerful as praise.
There's a phrase that's become popular over the past few years that fills me with wonder. That phrase is "quality time.
|Article List | Index | Site Map|
All logos, trademarks and articles on this site are property and copyright of their respective owner(s).
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest is Copyright © 2006 CanadaSEEK.com - All Rights Reserved.